March 23, 2009
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Fulfillment
So I was reading this post from a rec: http://www.xanga.com/Blue__Summer/696612528/submission-is-a-dirty-word/
And it got me to thinking - what is happiness?
Aristotle believed that happiness is the end goal of humanity. The 'telos', or end goal of mankind is to be happy and to seek happiness. Happiness to him was not self-gratification, it was a virtuous life, although he readily admits that Happiness is a term which is largely in dispute as to its meaning.
But it's interesting...the virtuous life. He was such a brilliant man. He speaks of virtue in terms of those things which we as a society most highly praise, and I think he might believe that somehow we are hard-wired to praise and revere certain things over others. The mean between the extremes is a very big part of the virtuous life...the mean between brashness and cowardice, for instance, is courage, and a courage is a virtuous action, virtue makes us happy, therefore, being a courageous person in your life is one way to be happy. And he does that with many other virtues - pride, temperance, generosity, truthfulness, etc. Fascinating. Nichomachean Ethics is a must read.
Anyway, the point being that who are we to say what happiness really is? Aristotle had his own definition, and certainly many people become happy by living by Aristotles definition of happiness. But suppose a woman wants to live her life in submission to her husband as defined by that featured post on revlife? So what? Why does it matter? Some people find happiness and fulfillment by sitting at home watching TV and cheetos all day long. And as long as they are not taking from or harming me and mine, why do I care? It's the same argument people make against gay marriage - it bothers them, so they don't want it to happen. But my question is always why do you give a shit? You shouldn't. It's their life. I can believe what I want about whether being gay is a sin or not, but ultimately, it's my own belief, and if they want to be gay and have the same benefits and rights as a straight couple, why not? If that makes them happy, and they're not harming anyone, why not let them?
And in the same way, if this woman in the revlife post finds meaning and happiness from submission to her husband, why does it matter to you? It takes all sorts, after all.
Comments (11)
I think you're completely right. Just because it's not the "norm" anymore to be submissive towards your husband, the man is the ruler of the house, etc. people automatically try to change any couple that live that lifestyle. But you're right. It's just like the debate on gay marriage. They want to live their life that way (and, of course, there's no abuse involved), and they should be able to. The same applies to women who submit to their husband's wishes in their marriage. Great thoughts!
As Christians, we believe that submitting to our husbands is submitting to God, because God ordained it that way. (Not to say our husbands are God. LOL!!) However, people have such a warped view of submission. They believe it means the wife just does what her husband tells her, and that's not it at all. As the wife submits to her husband, the husband is also commanded to submit to the will of God, who ordained that men must love their wives as Christ loves the church.
It's actually a very beautiful picture... i have a friend that describes it like a dance. People like to twist it to make it sound ugly and make the woman come across as brainless or something - when in all actuality that's not even close to the truth.
I think happiness is relative. Personally, I don't think I could ever find happiness in being truly submissive. Plus, if my SO is acting like a tard, I'm going to tell him to his face. And that should be okay.
Anyway, I mean, whatever. If she's really happy - cool. I just sort of doubt that she would be. That's just me though, I guess, and I'm just reflecting my own feelings.
Haven't you figured it out yet. To live differently, think differently, act deferentially, is a threat to the weaker minds out there. The odd must be ridiculed, especially if they are happy.
@trunthepaige - I do find it funny that oftentimes it's only okay to be different if you're being different in a way that's acceptable to everyone else...which isn't really being different at all. Be your own person - as long as that person agrees with me.
I get so irritated with the topic of submission. The Christians I know have a horrible way of explaining it and the nonChristians I know have a horrible paradigm about it. SO. FRUSTRATING.
Biblical submission is nothing more and nothing less than self-sacrifice. Who doesn't recognize the wealth in a relationship that functions on mutual self-sacrifice?! Who honestly wants to be in a mutually selfish relationship? Being selfless is not rejecting your personality or individuality or any such extreme notion. Being selfless merely means thinking of the other person first. Christians are told by God to submit to each other, not just their spouses. This is not an "I say, you do" relationship! Wives have a say in their marriage and in the direction of the family--husbands NEED their input! What they DON'T need is fraidy-cats or Amazon warriors. They need the help and support of a loving, committed, selfless woman. How is this a bad thing?
*sigh* Sorry. Like I said, so frustrating... Happiness--or rather, joy--is not something you create for yourself. It's something you receive, as a gift, after you've put in some hard work.
~V
Submission may seem like passivity but in the Christian sense it is duty.
As long as we are saying people have a right to be submissive, I agree. When we start telling other people who we think they should be, that's a problem.
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I think every real "sin" is theft. I'm sure I'm not the only one who has had this idea but I'll talk about it anyway..
You can physically steal someone's property. You can steal someone's life- murder. You can steal someone's thoughts- plagarism. You can lie to them, stealing their right to the truth. You can injure them and steal their potential. You can pass laws to steal their rights, their labor, their money.
People should pursue their happiness to the fullest extent that they are able. They can only be at fault when they deny someone else happiness- when they sacrifice someone else's happiness for their own.
<3
Hey, very interesting. I'm surprised I stumbled upon this blog. I JUST wrote a blog about humanity's chasing happiness. I get the feeling you wouldn't agree with it though.
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